when trying to catch a flight home yesterday, i thought i was in a win/win situation. there was one flight i was trying to catch was overbooked and i was on stand-by. if i could not get on the flight, not a problem. i would just get a hotel, rent a car, and then work until tuesday and fly back then. if i DID get on, i would be going home to jersey to see my family and eat, eat, eat, xbox, and eat. win/win right?

wrong.

i got on the flight as the very last person (i should have been on earlier since i was #2 on the standby list, but the gate agent screwed up), and on my right was a man who probably thought the two seats were his or at least should have bought them. his left leg was completely in my leg space and his left arm was about two inches into my side. whenever he reached for his computer, his elbow woud literally be 1 inch from my face. he was a black male (for steve and jason purposes), who i swear could have been either a linebacker or a sumo wrestler. he was a drummer from the caribbean, who reeked with incense. even his breath. how do i know he was a drummer, aside from his bandana and dreadlocks that were extremely long (and smelly)? he decided to play drum beats for 1.5 hours on his laptop and practice them using is air drums - without any headphones. sure, i like music but you try being crammed in a very very small space being forced to listen to drum beats for that long. the only thing i could think of was getting off that plane. what else? well, i had a rum and diet coke thinking that alcohol would be the solution to my problem as i usually think it is. but nope, my cup was leaking and made a big mess. the person to MY left, who happened to be a real nice guy, gave me his napkins and grabbed an extra cup and napkins for me - but it was too late. i downed the entire drink cuz it was leaking at a real fast rate.

two hours pass, and we should have been in jersey by now. the captain comes on the pda and announces that we have been circling greensboro, north carolina (ironically, my airport at school) the past two hours because newark put a holding pattern on us... and that we were out of fuel were going to land in baltimore. great. just perfect. the passengers become very pissed and noisy, and i'm praying that nobody knows i am an @irtr@n employee, despite all the company papers i have been (trying) to read. of course, even though it isn't the airline's fault at all, they blame the airline for everything. the people behind me are EXTREMELY angry, and start cussing out loud, dropping the F bomb every 1.2 seconds. so we land, nobody is allowed to get off the plane, i get up as FAST as i can and just hang out in the aisle. we refuel, then de-ice, then take off. the man behind me is told to put up his tray table, and he literally slams it shut as hard as he can, causing me and the man next to me to jolt forward. luckily, the man next to me is "cool" so he just ignores it. in the meantime, i'm thinking, 'thank God i am not the incredible hulk... cuz if i were...'

so we continue to newark and the flight is not that bad. the huge man next to me decided to use his ipod to listen to music since his laptop batteries died. but like all musicians, he turns the volume of his ipod to the max, so i could still hear everything.

finally land in newark, and i have to grab my luggage. i originally only had a carry-on, but the stewardess made me check it in since there was no more overhead space. so because of that, i miss my train (by 2 minutes) and have to take the next one. so it's 1am, and i am finally home.

whew, what a day. at least my luggage wasn't lost, like aileen's.

why didn't i just ask the huge black man to turn down the volume? right. like you would.